Pretty Little Liars // HOT WATER

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EVERYONE IS IN HOT WATER! What an appropriately named episode.  Season 3 just keeps getting better and better, and this episode (director by Chad Lowe, aka: Mr. Montgomery) continued to add more great story lines and more depth.  Let’s get to it.

DETECTIVE WILDEN

Okay.  Wilden has never been anyone’s favorite.  I hate him, the girls hate him, you hate him.  Nothing he did this episode surprised us, it just made us hate him even more.  We start out episode 20 with the girls having a post mortem about the elevator accident.  It’s interrupted by a Wilden ambush and disgust fills up all of our faces.  Aria, Spencer & Emily try to play it cool but Hanna calls Wilden all the way out.  She tells him about the picture they found of him with Allison & Cici and basically implies that they know he may have killed Ally.  He doesn’t like that much so he sends them home, but not before singling Hanna out … he seriously hates her… and foreshadowing to their next unpleasant meeting.  We next see Wilden rolling up on Cici and throwing her into his 1980’s police car … seriously why can’t they have updated automobiles on the Rosewood police force ?? Hanna spots him while out with her mom and Wilden gives her about 17 side eyes, 23 shady glances, and 48 murder faces.  Ashley picked up on the exchange, because out of all the moms on the show she’s the smartest, and doesn’t believe any of Hanna’s lies.  Her daughter finally tells her that Wilden may have had a relationship with Allison, but she knows that’s not the whole story.  Later that night Wilden pops up at her Single Woman Celebration … that’s what we call it when grown people go to dinner alone … and pushes a glass of wine towards her.  He wants her to ask Hanna to stop spreading rumors about him because he doesn’t want it to ruin his career.  Ashley isn’t having it, nor is she buying it.  When Wilden asks if she believes the rumor about he and Allison, her voice says nothing but her face says “..I KNOW YOU WAS HITTIN’ THAT!”  Once she leaves the restaurant and starts to drive home Wilden follows her and pulls her over in the middle of the woods.  … sidenote: I’ve seen waayyyy too many horror movies to let a cop pull me over in the middle of nowhere.  You’re much better off playing it safe and speeding to the nearest shopping mall to get arrested there, in public.  Otherwise you the run the risk of getting GOT … which leads me to this next altercation.  Wilden rolls up to Ashley’s window and throws all of his pigness around.  She complies at first because she doesn’t want any trouble, and she knows she didn’t do anything wrong.  Once out of the car he outright threatens her, verbally and physically, regarding Hanna and her big ass mouth.  But once again, Ashley is a G and she’s not putting up with him.  She shoves him away and gets back in her car.  When she tries to leave Wilden won’t get out of the way !!! “..EITHER YOU SHUT HANNA UP OR I WILL!” That’s all Ashley needed to here because Mama Lion came out and she ran his ass over !!!! …. goodness, the things we have to do for our children.  An hour or so goes by and Hanna finds her sitting alone in the dark with some 1957 aged Scotch.  When Hanna asks what’s wrong, she doesn’t lie, she doesn’t sugarcoat: “..I think i might have killed Detective Wilden..”  I honestly thought the episode was about to hit the credits then, but it didn’t!  Hanna takes her mom back out to the scene of the crime to get a better idea of the situation.  Somethings tell me they cut out the montage scene of them getting shovels and trash bags, because I’m 100% sure they had them in the trunk.  Nonetheless they didn’t have to use them, Wilden was GONE.  No body, no nothing.  I don’t suspect he left the scene himself, he’s crazy enough that he wouldn’t come after Ashley once he regained consciousness.  No this has Team “A” written all over it.  Just like they shanked Jason from the hospital last week … yea I know that Wilden mentioned that Jason was saying bad things about him, but Jason could’ve made those phone calls before the accident … I think Toby got them both tied up somewhere.  Or maybe even buried in the ground next to Garrett.  Either way, THE MOST is going on right now, and I’m loving every frame of it.

ARIA & EZRA

Well… Ezra’s back, and little Fitz has left the scene of the crime.  Aria finds Ezra in her bachelorette pad his apartment and nearly blabs on herself while leaving a message for Wes.  She rebounds quickly and turns the situation all on her #classicAria and gets mad about not hearing from Ezra for so long.  HELLO?!!? HE HAS A 7-YEAR-OLD SON … give the man some time Aria.  And that’s when I forget she’s in high school and he’s a grown ass man, and I go “..oh..”  They make up and he wants to be with her forever and she decides not to tell him about the tongue lashing Wes gave her while he was gone.  The next day Aria is ambushed by Mama Fitz and gets a reality check.  Now that Fitz has a son and a baby mama they’re going to be a huge priority in his life, basically sending her down to position number 4 .. right after 1. his son, 2. his baby mama, 3. his dedication to being mad that he grew up filthy rich.  It hits Aria, and she freaks out.  When she goes back to talk to Ezra about it she walks in on him fighting with his mom.  Fitz totally takes up for her and talks to him mom in a way no one from Compton or Detroit would … cuz they’d get punched in the throat.  Mama Fitz leaves cuz she ain’t got time for that, and Aria jumps into his arms because she’s reassured she’ll stay a top priority – or will she?  18 minutes later Ezra has to attend to a crisis.  His mom has decided to sell the condo that Maggy lives in.  I wonder how long it’s going to take for Maggy and son to move in with Ezra and Aria see them sitting at the kitchen table or on the couch like a real family … probably right around the time Wes is on spring break from school and comes to visit.  That’ll be interesting.

EMILY & PAIGE

Before I begin let me tell you about the petition I’m starting to insist that Paige be the next fatality on “A’s” list.  I don’t want Emily to be in a depressed slump again after the Mya incident but ugh, I can’t stand her.  To quickly sum it up, Emily & Hanna went with Paige to the costume store to find out who rented the Queen of Heart’s costume.  Shanna wouldn’t tell them so the girls distracted her while Emily hacked into the store’s iPad and stole the information.  Later on when Emily confronts Paige about her history with Shanna Paige admits the they used to date.  Then she calls her a substitute 0_0 .. a SUBSTITUTE! Like the teacher you hate and give shit to while your real teacher is out sick.  Like the basketball player you put in the game for 90 seconds to the star player can go pee and eat a Panera Bread muffin.  Like when a studio puts Isla Fisher in a movie because they can’t get Amy Adams.  Damn Paige … that’s low.

SPENCER

Well… Spencer is still going through it.  She can’t get out the bed, she’s skipping class, she’s sleeping with her eyes open in empty classes, and she’s running down the hall away from her best friends and hiding in bathroom stalls … in all my years of schooling I never hid in a bathroom stall, is that a girl thing? or just a TV/movie thing? Anyways, I’m just going to fast forward to her most interesting parts.  Wren shows up while Spencer’s at the coffee shop and tells her that the primary reason he came to see her last week was because he’s in love with her and hopes he can slide in since Toby is out of the picture.  That apparently sounded good to Spencer because they ended up going to dinner and then making out in the middle of the street #spencergothergrooveback Soon after, she sees the girl in the red coat but loses her in the foggy town of Rosewood.  When she gets home her shady ass sister Melissa warns her about hooking up with Wren, basically telling her it’s a bad idea.  Right when she said that we saw a twinkle in Spencer’s eyes we haven’t seen in a few weeks.  Her brain’s working, her cognitive thinking in back, she’s putting 2 and 2 and 5 and 8 together … she’s probably thinking what I’ve been saying since season one … MELISSA IS EVIL AND CAN’T BE TRUSTED.  Immediately following that conversation Spencer steps into her family’s personal sauna #ifiwasarichgirl but soon realizes that she’s been trapped inside !!! with a plunger no less.  She cries and wails for help but no one comes.  Melissa had “disappeared” and the only remnants of someone being there is a message from “A.”  Thankfully Aria shows up right in the nick of time and saves Spencer’s life.  Once Spencer pulls herself together you can tell that she’s fed alllllllllllll the way up.  She tells Aria to get Emily & Hanna over there immediately … “..this is about revenge for hooking up with Wren..” “..I know who’s been helping A..” !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PLUS…

– Emily goes to see Cici only to find Cici leaving town.  She’s terrified of Wilden because of the lengths he’s going to in order to keep his secret a secret.  This threw me off a little bit because I keep thinking Cici could be a part of the “A” team but now I’m not so sure.  Her best piece of information yet?  The fact that Melissa is the one who took the photo of her and Allison with Wilden.

– Still haven’t seen Toby .. in the flesh. 

– Here’s hoping to Emily being right about trusting Caleb’s dad.  I don’t buy it though, there’s not two $5 bills with that same red dice drawn on it in the town of Rosewood!

– four more episodes to go in season 3 … which means these next episodes are going to nothing short of monumental

BEST SCREEN GRABS:

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You’ve hit a new low in high school if you do this during your free time.

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Spencer got her grooooooooooove back!

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“..i have GOT to get me one of these!!” – Will Smith voice (Independence Day)

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Good one “A.”  Even I would be spooked if I saw this outside my shower.

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